Log entry number 1 (Nikolai) Edit
I always found it easier to keep myself in check when I made these log entries so I am going to start writing again. I am also going to make my team keep logs.
I woke up from cryo today. The Back with a Vengeance had finally arrived at Beta Maximus 35b. I was briefed on the situation by Richard Lee although there wasn't much intelligence to be briefed on. Currently all we knew was that their was some pirates that had taken TWIO and that we intended to rescue him.
Before he sent me away he gave me an unusual request. He said that after seeing the resistance in action he was convinced that the resistance had no chance against the chat unless they had got some training. He said that after this campaign that he would send me to Cheytac, a planet held by the civilian militia, to train replacements for the casualties that we were bound to have in this campaign. He gave uploaded the position of the planet to my tactical pad and then he told me that he would try to get me an unmanned gunship to use as protection and to ferry the new recruits back and forth from Cheytac to the Back with a Vengeance.
I was disappointed with this assignment. Everyone knew the saying "those who can't do teach" and I felt like my time as a warrior was over. I also realized that he was doing it so that me and Alysha would stop bickering. I am however, the best qualified person to train the new recruits because of my background as a guerrilla. Regardless of how I feel orders are orders.
Log entry number 2 (Nikolai) Edit
We hit a Mandalorian farmhouse hard today. We took all their stuff and we then started to interrogate them in their own front lawn.
My guilt about the war broke out again and it drove me to desperation to save the sangheili prisoners. In my desperation I turned to a side of myself that I didn't fully understand. I killed two mandalorian children. It tugs my heart and it only makes me more guilty. It was a black op so no one knew about the incident other than my team but still....... I don't think that Savior will forgive me.
Log entry number 3 (Nikolai) Edit
Kyle died today. I wasn't watching his back and the Maximite got took him hostage. I had to see him and his suit being welded together as some form of torture only a spartan can feel. He beheaded Kyle like the barbarian that they are on the front lawn of East point.
I keep wondering whether Kyle forgave me before he died. Since he was such a humanitarian, he either forgave me because I am human or hated me because of what I did to humans. I will have to assume that he did for my own sanity and for that of my team's.
The UNSC gave us all of these drugs to make us efficient killing machines but they didn't give us anything to keep us sane. It is like they think we will succeed outside because we are broken inside. While that has proven true in my situation I can't help but think that I was made to suffer in this sorrowful life.
I promised myself at Ancillian and at Na Zego that I would let the enemy get my spartans......................Did I lie?
Log entry number 4 (Blake) Edit
Kyle died. He was beheaded. BEHEADED. And the killer is still loose. I am beginning to wonder if this war can be won. Even if it is won by then we will all be dead and another war will have started.
I look back in history when times were peaceful and the killing didn't spread like a wildfire. I can across an interesting thought.
First, this is not my war. I don't have to take sides, but if I do it should be with the side that is going to win.
Second, the Chat are the only symbol of order and peace. If/When the Resistance, Galactic Republic, Remnant,pirates, separatists, mercenaries and Sirens win then they might start fighting each other over the true heirs of the galaxy.
And third, even if we do win the cost is to much. What we do today we will have to sleep with tonight. I don't think I would sleep if another of my friends are killed. Logically we must side with the chat. Logic is the compass that guides the mind and it is my Shepard.
I will meet with an Admin to day. They call him Forerunner. He says that he can get me the slipspace technology needed to get back home and he can get me close to The Maximite. I can't wait to kill that S.O.B. that killed Kyle. And all I have to do is kill Madam Celestial Saber. How hard can it be?